24th February 2014

I never said that, was the basis of this month's story. Brian volunteered to start. His story was about the charge of the Light Brigade. Joan Read a scary story about the crime of murder. Sue was a thoughtful attempt to overcome the problem of misunderstanding amongst friends. I confessed my sins only two minor ones. Joan promising a toy to a child and its repercussions.  Rosemary and a promise to marry made over the phone. Ann a weird play and falling asleep.

I was happy - next months sentence.

Pat got the most votes

I NEVER SAID THAT

Ellen and George had been married many years and both loved their house and garden...well, Ellen loved the garden more than George. He did dig, mow and

grow the usual veges.

Each morning they strolled around the pretty garden, weather permitting of course, Ellen with the secateurs at the ready and George whistling away. She always had to point out anything new and wondered if he really didn't see or didn't want to.

This particular morning they were discussing what they would do when they could no longer garden. Put it back to lawn Ellen said. That was how they first saw it years ago. Hmmm said George thoughtfully.

The next day Ellen and a friend had arranged to take a coach trip to Wisley. It was a wonderful day, the weather played along and they were inspired by the fantastic ideas. Ellen didn't know which way to look, there were so many new varieties and colours. Tired but happy they boarded the coach for home dozing most of the way.

It was dusk when they eventually arrived, George was waiting patiently. Ellen took a lovely relaxing bath after dinner and went to bed to dream of her garden...so much to do, so many ideas whirling around in her head.

The next morning they put on their garden shoes as it had rained overnight. Ellen stared...where was her carefully cultivated border! George took her by the arm, look, he said, “I saved most of the plants by potting them up, then had the border turfed over”. It looked perfect to him.

“But...but...lost for words...why did you do that”? “ Why, you said put it back the way it was he exclaimed”. “ I never said that she cried. I meant when we were old”! Then George handed her a card. Happy 90^th it read.

27 Jan Meeting at Sue's

Low in numbers today just eight of us all with good stories perhaps because we had two months to dream one up. But only 7 stories.
Joan E's compared old times with new, missing final part of films to catch the bus. Joan R's sibling's interest in butterflies. Rosemary no room in the Inns and safe passage through estate. Ann Letter that brings U3A interest. Sue, James Bond remembers after coma.
My story a ramble of thoughts.

Next month "I never said that"

The winning story is John's

BECAME INTRIGUED.

WHENEVER I SAW THE WOMAN IN BLACK I BECAME INTRIGUED BY HER APPEARANCE, BECAUSE SHE LOOKED QUITE UNLIKE ANYONE ELSE IN MY NEIGHBOURHOOD. SHE WAS NOT OF OUR NATIONALITY AS SHE HAD SERENE FAINTLY ORIENTAL FEATURES. I FOUND MYSELF ALMOST ADOPTING A SLIGHTLY STALKING ATTITUDE, WHICH I SCOLDED MYSELF ABOUT. NEVERTHELESS SHE EXERTED A HOLD ON MY IMAGINATION WHICH I FELT WOULD ONLY BE ASSUAGED BY MY EXCHANGING PLEASANTRIES WITH HER. I SHOULD EXPLAIN THAT, I CAME ACROSS HER WHEN I CAUGHT THE BUS INTO WORK EACH MORNING, AND SHE ALWAYS SEEMED TO BE AT THE SAME STOP. THERE WERE THE USUAL COMMUTERS WHO VERY RARELY SPOKE AND SO WE ALL TENDED TO BE IN OUR OWN LITTLE WORLDS. WELL I DECIDED I WANTED TO TALK TO THE SUBJECT OF MY INTEREST, AND EVENTUALLY I FOUND MYSELF SAT NEXT TO HER AND WAS QUITE LOST FOR WORDS. WHAT WOULD I SAY TO HER, AND WOULD SHE BE INSULTED BY MY MAKING CONTACT WITH HER? WELL THE CHANCE WENT AND I STOOD UP TO GIVE MY SEAT TO A LITTLE OLD LADY. I DIDN'T REALLY SEE TOO MUCH OF HER AGAIN FOR SOME TIME, BUT I STILL WAS HOPING TO FIND OUT MORE ABOUT HER. FINALLY, I DID GET TO SIT NEXT TO HER, AND I MADE SOME COMMENT ABOUT THE WEATHER, BUT TO MY SURPRISE SHE REPLIED IN WHAT I ASSUMED WAS MANDARIN CHINESE, WHICH TOOK ME QUITE BY SURPRISE. SHE SEEMED A BIT SHY OF ANY ATTENTION FROM ME SO I LEFT IT AT THAT. I CONTINUED SEEING HER ON THE BUS BUT DIDN'T ATTEMPT TO SPEAK APART FROM A NODDED "GOOD MORNING", BUT I WAS STILL INTRIGUED WITH HER.

ABOUT 6 MONTHS LATER I CHANGED MY JOB, WHICH DIDN'T INVOLVE USING THE LOCAL BUS, SO I LOST ANY CHANCE OF MEETING OR SEEING THE CHINESE LADY AGAIN. LIFE WENT ON WELL, ALTHOUGH I DID HOPE THAT ONE DAY LIFE WOULD IMPROVE, AND I WOULD MEET AND MARRY A LOVELY LADY. I DECIDED TO GET MYSELF A TAKEAWAY ONE EVENING AND WENT FOR THE FIRST TIME TO ONE THAT I'D NOT USED BEFORE, AND WAS STUNNED TO SEE THE SUBJECT OF MY PREVIOUS FASCINATION SERVING BEHIND THE COUNTER. AND YES, SHE SPOKE PERFECT ENGLISH. I MENTIONED THAT I USED TO SEE HER ON THE BUS, AND SHE DID AGREE THAT SHE REMEMBERED ME. I SAID THAT I ASSUMED THAT SHE COULD NOT SPEAK ENGLISH, BUT SHE SAID THAT SHE WAS SHY AND NERVOUS WHEN I SPOKE TO HER, WHICH WAS WHY SHE SPOKE IN HER NATIVE TONGUE. I GOT THE IMPRESSION THAT SHE WASN'T AVERSE TO OUR SPEAKING, SHE HELPED IN HER PARENTS BUSINESS AFTER WORKING IN A CITY BANK, AND BEFORE LONG I WAS HELPING HER AS WELL,

I'VE GOT TO TELL YOU, THAT I ATE MORE CHINESE TAKEAWAYS THAN WAS GOOD FOR ME OVER THE FOLLOWING MONTHS, BUT THE HAPPY OUTCOME IS THAT WE ARE ENGAGED TO MARRY AND IM BUSY LEARNING MANDARIN AND WRITING ORDERS OUT IN THAT LANGUAGE AS WELL.

November meeting

A full compliment today at John's on a cold morning. Pat started with a full report on the misuse of a 3D printer to produce counterfeit coins.  Joan Read all about the IRA and ending in a firing squad.  Brian about the Chinese storming the Gloucester's regiment in Korea. Ann stuck in the forest. Sally a new home for poor farm workers. Sheila on the way to pick up a school uniform. My story about a marriage heading for the rocks. Joan a walk around the block. Sue an amputee determined to walk.

Joint win Rosemary and John 3 votes each.

Rosemary's story

John's story
NOWHERE TO WALK. JAKE BROWN WAS A TYPICAL SMALL TOWN CROOK WHO MADE A LIVING, STEALING OPPORTUNISTICALLY WHENEVER HE COULD, AND WHILST, LIKE LOTS OF HIS FELLOW CRIMINALS, HE HAD A DRUG DEPENDENCY, HE WAS IN SOME WAYS, QUITE A LIKEABLE CHAP. HE WAS WELL KNOWN TO THE LOCAL BOBBIES WHO HAD A TIRED ACCEPTANCE OF HIS WAY OF LIFE, AND THEY KNEW THAT IF JAKE WAS BANG TO RIGHTS, HE WOULD RESIGNEDLY ACCEPT HIS LOT, WHICH WAS USUALLY ANOTHER STRETCH INSIDE. THIS PATTERN HAD BEEN THE CASE FOR A GOOD FEW YEARS, AND SO LIFE FOR JAKE BECAME QUITE PREDICTABLE. HE HAD A FEW RELATIONSHIPS WITH WOMEN, WHO INEVITABLY USED TO GET TIRED OF HIS ACTIVITIES, BUT THEN ONE DAY A LADY CAME INTO HIS LIFE, WHO WAS DETERMINED TO CHANGE HIM. YES, WE ALL KNOW ABOUT THESE WOMEN, WHO FEEL SURE THAT THEY CAN CHANGE THEIR MAN FOR THE BETTER, BUT GLORIA SEEMED DETERMINED, AND JAKE CERTAINLY GAVE THE IMPRESSION THAT HE WAS PREPARED TO GIVE IT A GO. SO, FOR A WHILE HE EVEN GOT A JOB, AS A ROADSWEEPER, AND GLORIA WAS HAPPY. WHY, HE EVEN GOT HIMSELF SOME PETS. A LITTLE KITTEN, A TATTY OLD MONGREL OF DOG CALLED WAYNE, AND A PARROT. WELL, THIS WENT ON WELL FOR A FEW MONTHS UNTIL WITH THE ICY ROADS JAKE FELL WHILST SWEEPING AND WAS SUDDENLY LAID UP WITH A BROKEN LEG. HE THEN HAD NOWHERE TO WALK IN THIS CONDITION, AND SPENT HOURS WITH HIS PETS AND SOON HAD THE PARROT SPEAKING QUITE WELL. HE SPENT MANY A DAY WITH HIS PETS, ALTHOUGH GLORIA HAD TO TAKE THE DOG OUT FOR WALKS. UNFORTUNATELY, ALL OF THIS SPARE TIME COULD NOT BE TAKEN UP COMPLETELY WITH HIS PETS AND JAKES MIND TURNED ONCE MORE TO HIS CRIMINAL THOUGHTS. ONE DAY AFTER HE HAD HIS PLASTERCAST REMOVED, JAKE DID A LITTLE TRIP AROUND THE NEIGHBOURHOOD, AND MANAGED TO GET INTO A HOUSE AND GOT AWAY WITH A GOOD SELECTION OF JEWELRY AND WATCHES, GOT HOME AND QUICKLY PUT IT AWAY IN HIS SECRET CUPBOARD. LET THINGS SETTLE DOWN HE THOUGHT AND THEN HE WOULD CONTACT HIS FENCE AND SELL IT ALL OFF. NEEDLESS TO SAY THE LOCAL BOBBIES DIDN'T TAKE TOO KINDLY TO A ROBBERY ON THEIR PATCH, AND AFTER A BIT OF DIGGING JAKE'S NAME CAME INTO THE FRAME. HE HADN'T GOT RID OF THE ILL GOTTEN GAINS EITHER WHEN THEY PAID HIM A VISIT. GLORIA WAS SHOCKED TOO. SHE'D FELT THAT JAKE HAD BECOME A BETTER FELLOW UNDER HER WATCHFUL EYE, BUT OF COURSE HE COULDN'T RESIST THE CHANCE TO GET BACK TO HIS OLD WAYS. JAKE PLEADED HIS INNOCENCE TO THE LAW, AND ALL WAS LOOKING GOOD UNTIL HIS BELOVED PARROT SUDDENLY CHIRPED UP IN ANSWER TO THE POLICEMAN ASKING WHERE THE SWAG WAS, BY SQUAKING "ITS IN THE CUPBOARD". BLAST IT THOUGHT JAKE AS HE WAS LED AWAY LOOKING AT ANOTHER STRETCH INSIDE. GLORIA WAS DISTRAUGHT, BUT THE PARROT SEEMED TO HAVE A SORT OF GLOW ABOUT HIM AS JAKE WAS LED OUT OF THE DOOR.

No meeting December
January Became intrigued

28th Oct

The morning after the storm we met at Jack & Joan's, eleven of us. Brian jumped in to start with a Goose fair past and present. Joan E house removal. My story of my love of motor bikes when young. Sally 80 mph gales. Sue two old codgers and a bomb. Rosemary Ship Street nostalgia. Sheila throwing apple cores in gardens. John's sad tale. Joan R SAS men.
Next month "nowhere to walk" at John's.

Pat got top votes.

THE ROAD WAS CLOSED

During one of my contemplative moments I was thinking about the 3^rd age. Actually I believe there are 5 ages...if you are lucky.
Being totally dependent on others at during the 1^stmini age.
Hopefully you make it unscathed to the 2nd age, the teenage years, when your brain and eyes slowly open to the world around you. The adults don't seem to know whats going on, finding it hard to understand you. Why do they seem cross all the time.

To my mind the 3^rd age is those middle years. Time to ditch the long

hair and short skirts, concentrate on work and family and finally feeling like a grown up.

As the 4^th age dawns we all look forward to retirement. We still have plenty of energy to garden and do up the house, take lots of holidays. Time to meet new friends and try something different. Learning is more fun these days. No exams to take. Families reshape over time, with marriages, divorces, new babies and departure, sometimes much to early. Christmas is to be endured these days, after all its basically for the young unless you are a churchgoer.

Now the 5^th age is really old age. The teeth are not what they were which makes you very careful. There are many decisions, for instance to carry on colouring the hair , keep on driving as long as possible, bother to renew the passport? At 3am all is black with the world. What to do with my favourite books, jewelry and carefully dusted little treasures? Will it all end up in the tip? Make a mental note to leave all paperwork in order and drawers tidy, you never know do you!

Waking up is a great start to the day, that means my number isn't up yet...that road is still closed. Keep taking the pills and try not to fall over.

If only I knew how long I had left I would know how much I could spend!

23 September at Pat & Brian's

Just nine of us with ten stories one from absent Sue read by Sheila all about two runaway children lost in the Australian desert. Joan wrote about a small coastal town. John RAF and a depressed young lady who commits suicide. Ann unfortunate youngster breaks leg in an orchard. Sally all about dogs. Pat a visit to Hurst castle. Sheila first prize for flower display. Rosemary, Brian and myself all got two votes each so here are all three. Rosemary still hasn't got the computer working.

Next month "the road was closed"


 Brian's first

 LARGE SPRING. In A small village in North Wales, they tell of an old legend.. That there was a beautiful young girl named Winifred. It is said that she was no older than Nineteen, of sweet face unmarked by disease, hair, dark as the feathers of a ravens wing, hung long and straight to her slender waist, her eyes were of the lightest blue. Her family was not of the peasant class, nor were they very wealthy. Winifred was in love with a tall handsome young man, Thomas, who's family was the richest and most powerful family in the whole of North Wales. Winifred and Thomas would met in secret, near a charcoal burners cottage in the woods near the village.
 One day Winifred went to met Thomas, wearing her favourite red dress, over this a light woollen hooded cloak. She was a little late arriving at the spot to met Thomas, a bird shrieked in the tree top, as if to warn her. There standing in the spot where she and Thomas met was a dark cloaked figure, he grinned at her. He was a stocky man, grey haired and a square plaited beard in two thick ropes fastened with silver clasps. His forearms were scare, on his belt, around his waist hung a thick-bladed sword. The man was Thomas' father, 

“ Listen to me girl, I told Thomas you will never see each other again. I have made a match for him with Lord Owen's daughter, I know that he can disobedient, headstrong, and foolish . So I have sent him to his uncles house, until the marriage.” With this Winifred fell to her knees and told him that she would pray that he would always remember her, and she would wait for him. With that the fathers face turned red with anger, he draw his sword and with swift slice of the blade he decapitated her. Her head rolled down a slight slope and from the spot where it came to rest a LARGE SPRING gushed forth. The murderer was immediately dispatched by a heaven-sent thunderbolt. Over time the spring became famous for it healing powers. Its waters it is said can cure a broken heart, if you wash you hands and face with the water you will never have any face scaring diseases. Is that why, to this day ALL the people in that village have beautiful clear, unmarked skin.??? Even in old age.

Rosemary's



L



Bill's

A large spring
I feel that my life is controlled by two clockwork springs, a large spring, that runs once only for my whole life and another small one that runs for a whole day. My imagination brings to mind a large brass mechanism with cogs and levers working harmoniously, ticking away away to power my self. My first day measured by the smaller spring was my birthday. My first actual day of birth when the spring was already tightly wound and concealed a huge amount of energy.

So that early in the day was the time to throw the body around and make noises that belied the size of the body that it emanated from. It was set to run fast and lasted only for a short period before suddenly stopping but as time flowed on it slowed so that it lasted a whole day before requiring a night's sleep to rewind. But now many years later it no longer has the energy of the past glory days but still serves me well only partially slowing after lunch when sleep beckons.

The large spring is fully wound on birth and slowly unwinds during a lifetime. In my case reaching the end of its life it slips occasionally, the attached pendulum momentarily falters and I find myself in a situation surrounded by people or places that I don't recall leading up to. But knowing that we live in such a mysterious unknowable reality I find it is best to accept it and continue to react to whatever presents itself.   If anyone notices the sudden jolt of recognition as you struggle to make sense of where you are or who you are with, you have to smile at them reassuringly to stop them from running away in panic.

The main thing is that there is still enough of the spring's length to unwind to last a few more years before it finally stops for good. Scientists do say we have biological rhythms for measuring time so it is not far from the truth. These rhythms are driven by what they call a circadian clock, and rhythms have been widely observed in plants, animals and  fungi but of course we all know that. Oh Dear I've just had another one of those jolts that accompany the spring jerking forward. It feels that it was only a moment ago I was sitting in front of my computer typing this out but now here I am reading out this daft story to the creative writing group. Never mind I'll just make the best of it and continue reading then they won't notice anything amiss.

26th August.

Nine of us today on a sunny morning but we decided to stay inside. Rosemary an unfortunate dog that was run over after being too snooty.  Sheila, Daisy walked up the ladder to success.  Brian one tree chopped down too many. John cheating book-keeper. Ann sick child gets wish. Joan pony training. I wrote about a fierce teacher starting a new school.

Next month "large  spring" 23 Sept at John's

Joan and Pat tied

This is Joans

Her reputation

Evelyn Grant was 65 years old and had been a widow for 10 years the first two years were the worst but with the help of friends and family she felt she now had a good life and a reputation for getting things done this was down to her mother who had told her when she was very young not to say she would do some thing unless she was sure she could do it and up until last year she had lived by this rule. It was a Tuesday and she was out to lunch with friends from the U3 A group she belonged to listening to every thing they had been doing such as yoga, tennis, golf, walking ect now she considered herself fairly fit but she did not do much exercise she was quite lazy in that respect. There was a pause in the conversation and she heard herself saying "I am thinking of running the London Marathon next year" every one looked at her in amazement, so she quickly added "That's if I get a place". Mary one of the group then said "perhaps if you apply on U3 A headed paper it will give you an advantage" so it was decided that this is what she would do and against all odds and to her dismay back came the number she would have 4462.

Since then she had been getting up at 6am to go running at the start she could not jog to the end of the road, let alone run, with out getting puffed and the stitch in her side but gradually as the months progressed it became easier she was now running twice a day morning and evening.

But unfortunately she was still only able to run fifteen and a half miles far short of what she needed. One of the ladies she sometimes ran with said she had heard if you run 15 miles in the forest that is like 20 on the road because of the uneven ground. So this particular Saturday morning she decided that's what she would do it was a beautiful morning there had been a slight shower the night before so every thing smelt fresh. She was jogging along very happily and was just going down an incline when out of no where a deer ran across her path it gave her such a fright that she stumbled, fell and rolled the rest of the way down landing in a small stream at the bottom. She lay there for a while getting her breath back, as she tried to move she had a terrible pain in her left leg she looked down and saw that a bone was protruding through the skin just under her knee. She went to get her cell phone then remembered it was on the kitchen table all she had was a letter from her sister that she was going to read later she realised that she had to get out of the stream so she tried once again but the pain made her pass out. Evelyn thought she felt something cold on her cheek and rustling then talking "Evelyn wake up, open your eyes" as she opened her eyes the nurse was saying "Do you remember you had a fall a dog found you and his owner called for an ambulance" As she fell back to sleep she thought at least her reputation was still good as she could not run the marathon now could she?

This is Pat's

HER REPUTATION

It was 'bake a cake' competition time again. I groaned inwardly as not being especially creative at cooking, I felt that I had to have a go.

After all, I belonged to the local Women's group who were very enthusiastic.

1. First, choose a recipe and make sure that I had all the ingredients. No improvising which is what I usually do, which probably accounts for my many disasters.

The cake was duly baked and I carefully carried it across the road to the

hall. Looking at the other entries I placed mine between two lavish designs hoping to go unnoticed. Some people just seem to go overboard at these things don't they.

Along came the judges, pens and pads aloft. They carefully examined each entrant, then proceeded to cut a small slice which was minutely inspected and notes were takes. It was all very tense and I stifled a giggle. Mine was checked, cut and tasted in turn, notes were duly written and they moved on.

Finally the serious business of deciding a winner was over, The ladies all sat down to tea and cake of course. We all knew who the winner was, indeed, she had outdone herself with a wonderful chocolate creation., and we ooo'd and aaahd. Her reputation was intact.

As no one had taken had bothered to take a piece of mine, I picked it up to take home to my other half or the birds. Looking back, I was just in time to see the winner trip over the step and the beautiful cake went flying through the air to a stunned silence.

29th July Meeting

Nine of us today met up at cheznous, Joan R started with a story a link we all thought of when we think about the curtain swished a funeral story and murder most foul. Sheila, school lessons and drama dress rehearsals. John told of a start to a happy union with a mysterious brother in MI5. Ann, about two boys finding a subject that they were both interested in. Sally, theatre and its destruction in 1943. Rosemary Captain Cooke suffering from a fever sees future. Joan a day at the seaside. My story Hazel's last day at home. Sue, dress rehearsal and successful play but no affection for producer.
 Next month P&B "her reputation"

 Rosemary voted the winner